If I’m Gonna Be Heckled I’m Gonna Go Back To Doing Stand Up

I’m gonna write about my neighbor because I hate her. I generally try to get along with the people I live near. I’m not that friendly but I’m not a shitty neighbor. I try to keep the noise down after the normal day person hours. I generally live a much quieter life than I would … Continue reading If I’m Gonna Be Heckled I’m Gonna Go Back To Doing Stand Up

A Rant

I’m just gonna bitch about my life for a second and you, dear reader, will either read it, ignore it, label me an entitled little while girl and move on, or whatever the fuck you want. Who knows maybe it will be your favorite and you will print it out and send it to people … Continue reading A Rant

Cadillac Lounge — I’m Out!

No More Cadillac Lounge Last week when I went to the cadillac lounge I was asked to sign a form saying that prostitution would not be tolerated, that anyone caught engaging in such activities would be fired immediately. I asked the housemum if this was going to be enforced. She shrugged and told me that … Continue reading Cadillac Lounge — I’m Out!

Never Ask If You Can Sleep With Someone’s Friend

I fell in lust in San Diego   Oh gawd this shit almost never happens to me.  I pride myself on not liking people.  I really can’t ever get into some dude.  Why would I?   I knocked on my friend’s door but this big buff dude came to the door in boxers, a neon … Continue reading Never Ask If You Can Sleep With Someone’s Friend

I Pissed on a Bitch in Target

I wish I had been in the mood to piss on him out in the open in the middle of the store. Like in Ladies Panties or something.  Sadly we went to the bathroom.  I was already at the store shopping, visiting a friend who can’t get a good job with zirs master degree so … Continue reading I Pissed on a Bitch in Target

Why I Work As A Stripper

I’m well educated and I have a really nice middle class job.  So why in the hell do I work in seedy bars half naked doing dirty things with strange men for money?  Because I like it.   I like the rush I get from meeting you in a dimly lit bar, with music so … Continue reading Why I Work As A Stripper

Dr Pee

I left the club at 1:00 in the morning. I called to confirm and headed to Boston. I grew up in hospitals, my mother was a nurse. most people dislike hospitals, I love them, I love the way they smell. antiseptic. clean, like the smell of disease, washed away. it reminds me of my home. … Continue reading Dr Pee

Tips for Keeping Your Pussy Healthy

One of the best things about being a sexpert is that sometimes my childhood friends will ask me for sex advice. I dislike a lot of needy email but when people I care about trust me with their secrets I feel all warm and cozy, like I have done something useful with my life. Today … Continue reading Tips for Keeping Your Pussy Healthy