widowcentauri

Man Fits

In Adventure, American Dominatrix, bitch, bitchy, bullshit, cheap men, culture, culture clash, deviance, dominatrix, drama, Education, Family, FAQ, fights, gender, Gender bending, GLBT, GLBTQ, Kindness, neurosis, paying for it, politics, Pride, San Diego, Widow Centauri on August 29, 2009 at 8:23 pm

Lately it seems that a lot of full-grown men feel inspired to yell at me.  This is both sad and pathetic.  As an activist working to remove the gender binary I can see these more prevalent man fits as being a sign of the changing times.  But in a world that says it is not alright for boys to cry why is it alright for men to throw fits that make them look more like 14 year old girls than men?

Maybe it is the fact that I am living my dreams.  When a woman decides peruse her education far beyond that of the men in her family, she takes a certain risk.  A risk that does not guarantee that the aforementioned men will treat her with respect, or even be civil for that matter.

My father, bless his pointed little head, threw a full fledged fit where he called me some very nasty names and told me point blank that I was never wanted and basically ruined his life.

Another man in my family has been screaming at me all day about the ludicrousness of my research, insisting that school and education should be for pragmatic reasons and nothing more.  “Airplanes, the internet and stuff.” Obviously the value of critical thought was not very well instilled in his belief system.  Oh well, it is typical for men who feel threatened to lash out at women who take charge and pursue their dreams.  Especially when the woman doing it was voted “most like to do time” in high school.

Though my experience in San Diego does feel like doing time, I am not.  I am working hard to attain a level of education that will allow me to be a professional scholar.  If you find yourself wondering why I would want that you obviously have not read enough of my blog.  I value literacy and I would like to encourage other people to up the bar in regards to intellectual pursuits.  It is high time our lazy greedy American society got off its carcass and read something.  With all of the pointless celebrities and mass media bullshit out there how is it possible for anyone to learn to love learning?  We are all so bombarded with adverts about how to make it big, how to add more bling to our lives, the newest widget for the lowest price – it will make your teeth white and your bank account full, it will give you sex appeal, it will solve all your problems, bla bla bla.  I’m sick of the pointlessness of American values.  I want to go door to door encouraging people to watch the BBC, giving them library cards and telling them that pretty is not enough, you need to smarten up – all of you.

Man fits are something that I am going to have to learn to cope with.  I can see that as I project a new more intellectual self, people are going to yell at me, call me names and expect that I care.  I don’t.

Some of the names I have been called through the course of the last man fit week include depressed, capitalist, bunion, and abusive.  This is not an exhaustive list as many many hours have gone into the ordeal of dealing with these petty insecurities being strewn at me.  This is just the short list of funny things I am not.  These are the ones that stood out as the sad lashing out that happens when men feel threatened.

Pity the hot chick is smarter than you, isn’t it.

  1. Hey Widow, Darín here from the Rock-it-Room. Great post. Although I have not encountered a man fit as of late, I definitely have a lot of moments with family members, especially my dad, where I realize I’m thinking some place that feels light years away from their values and belief systems and that it is due to having a liberal arts education and not just having a generational difference or identity and lifestyle differences.

  2. I think a lot of people see a smart person, and especially a smart woman, as a threat. America “grew up” with an oddly anti-intellectual focus, and it echoes in opinions like what you’re getting, and moreso with the long-held belief that lovely women can’t also be smart.

    As a man who’s been privileged to date and/or dominate a number of women smarter than him, I find it…baffling. And as someone who himself studies a wide variety of subjects for pleasure (including pleasure), I think those people are just crazy.

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