Archive for June, 2008|Monthly archive page

Porn Censorship

In censorship, kink, perverts, politics on June 21, 2008 at 6:54 pm

You could argue that porn should be censored that if we don’t stop porn producers now they will take this smut and destroy everything.  But you would have to ask yourself why you want to stop pornography.  Is it because you don’t agree with visual depiction of sexual activities?  Is it because you are a prude? Or is it because you are attempting to encroach on our civil liberties?

Porn is an art form.  It is a genre of movie making that has a very long history of censorship.  If you believe in the first amendment why are you willing to sell out when it comes to porn?  It would seem that this nation I love so much is very hypocritical. Am I just discovering this?  My art is good but your art should be banned.  Huh?

According to AVN (Adult Video News) John Stagliano has been indicted on federal obscenity charges.  Obscenity is a strange law.  It is based on the view point of “average citizens.”  Whatever that means.  Obscenity can not be defined as a crime in the way that other crimes can be because quite frankly it is a matter of censorship.  Obscenity is a loophole that can be thrown at pornographers if someone in power is pissed off at them.

I watch a lot of porn, I read porn, I write porn.  I have always been fascinated by pornography in it’s many genres, styles, and mediums.  I LOVE PORN.  Always have, always will.  Granted there are types of porn that I like more than others but isn’t that why there is so much to choose from, because everyone who loves porn has a particular taste for it.  It is a style preference.

I have not seen the videos in question (Jay Sin’s Milk Nymphos, Joey Silvera’s Storm Squirters 2 and an online trailer for Belladonna’s Fetish Fanatic 5) but I’m sure that a lot of money went into the federal indicting of Stagliano.  Why?

Why would a country in such dire shape spend any money on squelching porn?  Censorship.  It all comes back to censorship.  I think the USA is going to a lot of trouble to crush adult content.  I’m not the only one who feels this way.

“Restricting the amount and type of sexually explicit material you’re allowed to look at in private (and driving it’s producers and distributors out of business) is only one part of the battle against pornography.  The other is a massive disinformation campaign” (Klein 123).

A disinformation campaign?  Like a conspiracy to keep us from knowing the truth about certain issues?  OMG – The US government would do that?  Doesn’t that make them a little like Nazi Germany?

What else will this government restrict?  News On The Iraq War?  Yep!  Medial care for it’s citizens?  You know it!  My ability to engage in consensual anal sex in Georgia?  Noooooooooo!

I love anal sex in states with sodomy laws – it makes it that much dirtier.  Maybe that’s why the laws are in place.  To make the sex better.  Hmmm.

May is victims of pornography month.  To celebrate I’m making porn all month.  What are you doing?


Adult Video News

Klien, Marty PhD. America’s War on Sex: the Attack On Law, Lust, And Liberty.  Westport CT.  2006

Humiliation and Golden Showers

In BDSM, bitch, dominatrix, perverts on June 21, 2008 at 1:56 pm

I love the combination of humiliation and golden showers.  Today I saw a very pretty boy who told me that he loved being peed on and that the humiliation element was what made it all the more exciting. When he made it to the dungeon I had him strip and fold his clothing up.  I turned him around and got a good look at him, thank god a pretty one.  Oh boy, he wasn’t bad to look at at all.

I put him in the cage and pulled his head through the hole in the top.  He squirmed and squirmed until he could sit up and get his head through the hole.  I guess he has something of a short neck because it was something of a challenge for him to accomplish this physical nincompoopary.  Once he was situated I chained his hands to the outside of the cage, poured myself another glass of water and had a seat.

I put my big fat white ass right on his head and thought “dam what a feat of engineering.  Thanks Sonny Black.”  He gasped for air and I realized that I should pay more attention to the bitch I am sitting on and less to the marvel of dungeon furniture dot com.  I sat there smothering his face.  When I couldn’t help myself any more I told him to lick my ass crack.  His tongue was well trained.

Usually I find it particularly tacky when a boy tells me that he is talented with his tongue or some such nonsense but this bitch knew what to do with that tongue.  After I emptied off the gallon of water that I was working on I turned and spat in his face “Pathetic little worm I hope that’s not the best you can do.”

I pulled him from the cage and shoved him into my claw foot bathtub.  “look at that tiny little dick”  I said in a tone that was probably just a little too loud.  “It does get bigger than that, right?”  I asked mocking the scared looking water snake.  “stroke it”  I wanted to see if it would really grow or if the bitch was going to stay scared the whole time.  I climbed up on the edge of the tub and lifted my skirt, so I wouldn’t get it wet.  “open wide” I said.  He closed his eyes and opened his mouth.  I let him wait for it.  When he opened his eyes I squirt him in the eye.  “Thank me”  I demanded.  “Thank you mistress” he uttered.  Then I pissed all over his face.  He was sputtering, trying to get some air.  I cut off the flow.  “Ask me for more you pathetic little worm.”  Before he could bumble out his request I shot my piss half way down the tub and it landed on his dick, which was now substantially larger.  “Oh thank you mistress please may I have some more?”  he babbled.

“Open your mouth” I told him.  I took a deep inhalation and hacked up a phlegm wad.  I spat it on his face.  I squirt piss in his mouth.  “Swallow it.  Wash the phlegm down with my piss you filthy pathetic toilet boy.”

Sex Work and Social Justice

In BDSM, bondage, bullshit, censorship, culture, discrimination, dominatrix, drama, dungeon, Family, FAQ, fights, GLBTQ, Golden Showers, kink, one-woman show, perverts, politics, porn, Pride, sexual politics, Transsexual, whores on June 16, 2008 at 1:29 am

I will be teaching at the Desiree Alliance conference in Chicago next month.  My director and I will be discussing the realities of writing and performing one person shows to create social change.  The Desiree Alliance is a sex workers rights organization, if you didn’t know.  As Antioch alumni I have been so indoctrinated into the idea of social justice being the only reason to get out of bed and not jump off a bridge that I find this conference to be one that I am personally and professionally invested in. 

I have been involved in the sex industry in one capacity or another since I turned 18.  My first research papers in college were focused on sex education, For eight seconds I worked as a stripper, then I became a professional dominatrix.  The transition was a pretty smoothe one.  I found that I liked the gig because it was difficult.  I could manage my business independently and fund my education.  And then there was also the fact hat I could wear tight sexy clothing and designer shoes while mastering the art of slapping a boy in the face!  I do love being a dominatrix. 

Anyway, the conference is a gathering of the most politically active sex workers and their allies.  We have been invited to speak about how writing and performing one-person shows about sex work is a tool for social change.  My new show If Lucy Had A Whip is a personal story about my first few years as a dominatrix.  I was hired with almost no experience and had to fumble my way through the sessions, learning how to tie knots and crack whips as I went.  As you can imagine any number of things could have gone wrong.  Thankfully nothing ever did. 

 In 2000 a woman named Barbra Asher was tried and acquitted of manslaughter in the state of Massachusetts.  A simple goggle search will bring up all of the gory things this woman was accused of doing, all of them fabricated by the authorities.  There was never even a body found, so how could there have been a murder?  My point in mentioning Barbra is that we must start standing up for our rights.  If we can not be out about who we are, what we do and (dare I say) proud of it – big brother will be criminalizing all of us. 

 Between making things like golden showers a criminal offence in the state of Connecticut (buried in a prostitution statute that was amended several years back after a girl was filmed passed out having guys ejaculate onto her face), 2257 regulations prosecuting mom and pop content producers, and obscenity charges being re-worded so that the state of California can prosecute John Stagliano over a main stream porno being too over the top – I ask you, what has happened to our rights?  What is next?  How can you sit there in front of your computer and just download quietly? 

Stop just tugging on your tail. Perverts unite!  Don’t let the US government redact our rights any more.  Why are we all so content to sit around and allow the activities we have been enjoying legally to become criminalized?  Maybe because we are a nation of sheep saying things like “there is nothing I can do” between baaa baaaa baaas. 

Now that I got that little political rant off my chest I hope that you will support the Desiree Alliance and fight for sex workers rights.  I know you all like to indulge in the rights you have to visit dungeons, strip clubs, download porn, read my blog, and be your pervy self.  Don’t let big brother change the rules.  “It is only through definite knowledge of the potential emergent trends in social reality that active intervention to promote social change can have any success” (Giddens 93).  Adult entertainment is not a crime.  We all know what is happening to our civil rights.  Stop baaing like sheep and do something. 

Visit the Desiree Alliance website, give them money, and (if you can) come to the conference.  http://www.desireealliance.org/




Giddens, Anthony. Capitalism and Modern Social Theory. Cambridge UP, 1971 



How To Turn Your Boyfriend into Your Girlfriend

In BDSM, corsets, Cuckold, culture, dating, deviance, dominatrix, FAQ, forced feminazation, Gender bending, Lorelei, Los Angeles, politics, T-Girls, Trannies on June 14, 2008 at 11:12 pm


How To Turn Your Boyfriend into Your Girlfriend


This paper is going to outline how to take your average, run of the mill, XY chromosome, genetic male and turn him into a shemale — a non-operational transsexual woman! Let me start by saying that this is by no means a joke or something to be done to someone against their will.  Rather it is a brief how to guide, composed in an academic format, designed to give a realistic look at the process of gender modification. Given the brevity of this paper, I have chosen to limit my scope of focus to the male to female (MTF) transsexual.

When people hear the words “sex change” they often conjure up gruesome images of men having their penises chopped off Lorraine Bobbitt style. I would like to get this nasty misconception out of the way right now. Gender Identity Disorder (GID) is a serious social phenomena currently classified as a medical and psychological issue. Nothing that resembles what Lorraine Bobbitt did to her husband happens during genital reassignment surgery (GRS).

GRS has been available for almost 40 years. The surgery has yet to be perfected. Dr. Shelia Kirk, founder of the Transgender Surgical and Medical Center, says: “Currently there is no formal training program in Trans-surgery; informal mentoring and exchange with other surgeons is the method that is used by all who work in this surgical discipline.” 1 Clearly GRS is still in its infancy.  Does GRS make a MTF transsexual a “real woman”? Does the decision to forgo GRS make a MTF transsexual any less of a woman? The verdict is still out on that one.  Sexperts and gender experts will speak of a spectrum of gender differences but in my experience, the average layperson tends to identify gender with what is inside your panties. 

There are many different reasons to forgo GRS. It is painful, lessens the genital sensitivity, and is extraordinarily costly.  Pat Califia in her book Sex Changes tells us: “It is my impression that fewer and fewer MTFs are seeking genital surgery. … They know about the urinary tract infections, poor healing, numbness, lack of lubrication, [lack of] flexibility, and inorgasmia that often accompany vaginoplasty.”



There are many things to consider when beginning the process of gender modification. The first and foremost is the mental health and well-being of the transgendered person. Transgenderism is confusing stuff. Often transgendered people know from a very young age that they are not really the gender that everyone insists upon. Often they are very confused and distraught because of the social paradigms protecting the dual binary gender structure. As young children they experiment with different gender roles, often being scolded for their gender inappropriate behavior.


Madeline H. Wyndzen of genderpsychology.org puts it this way:

It feels like everything should have been so obvious when I look back. But everything was so confusing as I grew up. It’s like, one day I was absent and everybody else was taught the crucial aspects of being a boy or girl. I would lie in bed at night practicing and rehearsing how to be a boy. One day in middle school, after being pushed around again, a principal tried to teach me to ‘stop crying’ and ‘be a man.’ Bullies, teachers, and others taught me the same thing: there was something terribly wrong with my feelings. I tried so hard to purge from myself every expression of emotion. Really I only needed to be taught one lesson; we do not need to learn to be ourselves, we just are ourselves. 3


If we could all learn that important lesson of just being ourselves life would be much simpler. Often in life we may feel moved to see a mental health professional. The MTF transsexual is up against countless social obstacles in her transition. Family, friends, significant others, employers, and DMV personnel will all have questions. Many will have opinions, tears, guilt trips, and political agendas to add to the confusion of a transitioning person. Most of the people mean well but have a very hard time accepting the transgenderism of their loved one. There are thousands of therapists who specialize in gender issues. Gay and lesbian centers are excellent resources for connecting to a gender aware therapist in your area. 

When it comes to maintaining the mental health of MTF transsexuals we must look at the Harry Benjamin Standards Of Care (SOC), as they are the standards used to treat the transgendered. “Psychotherapy is Not an Absolute Requirement  … Not every adult gender patient requires psychotherapy in order to proceed with hormone therapy, the real life experience, hormones, or surgery.” 4 It is a common misconception that six months of psychotherapy is required but “One letter from a mental health professional … written to the physician who will be responsible for the patient’s medical treatment, is sufficient for instituting hormone therapy or for a referral for breast surgery.” 5




Often the MTF will have experimented with cross-dressing. Before any sort of hormone therapy should begin the MTF should most definitely spend time dressed as a woman. Begin by mastering feminine mannerisms as early on as possible. In New York City you will find Miss Vera’s Finishing School For Boys Who Want To Be Girls. On Miss Vera’s website you will discover that classes are available for cross dressers and their significant others. Miss Vera instructs techniques in make up, maid training, even ballet! Her school is world-renowned and is the first institution of its kind-offering drop in classes in feminization, weekend intensives, and a yearlong program designed to completely transform. 6

You may be wondering what order to take the steps in this transformation. It depends on what the MTF’s particular needs are. If he is even a little hairier than your average woman, hair removal will be your first stop. It may be tempting to shave him. Shaving can be fun but it is also time consuming and very messy! To maintain a constant state of hairlessness is necessary. I mean, how many women do you know who have excessive chest hair? According to Vittorio and Lehrer in their article Laser Hair Removal, “Several different types of hair lasers are currently available. … Many hair removal lasers categorize patients according to their ability to burn or tan in response to sun exposure.” 7 It is a combination of dark hair and light skin that is ultimately the best for removal of hair via laser surgery. I have heard from patients that it can be very painful. And as Vittorio and Lehrer point out: “patients should not expect or be guaranteed permanent hair removal. A realistic expectation is a 50 to 70% reduction in hair density over the course of multiple treatments.” 8  This is a statement that the AMA requires. I know many people who have had permanent results with laser hair removal.

Once the MTF is as hairless as that poor cat your neighbor’s kid shaved, you can go ahead and paint her hairless face with make up. Well quite frankly you can make up the face of your MTF transsexual well before laser surgery has been done. Be sure she has a close shave and resist the temptation to use your make up on her. Men require much more dramatic make up than women.  Even though your man is a woman she still has the complexion of a man. Kevyn Aucoin’s Making Faces is an excellent reference for learning make up techniques. If you live in a major metropolitan city you can also hire a professional make up artist for private consultations. When learning about the specific needs of feminizing via make up please be patient. It often takes a very long time, it can be frustrating, and in the beginning may look pretty funny! Make up is one of the fun elements of gender bending so just keep playing with it. Luckily, it washes off!

Lets talk about clothing. Often it is difficult to purchase clothing in very large women’s sizes. It is important to have a certain sense of style and to shop carefully. Reverend Mac tells me “ Some of the most important aspects of a MTF’s wardrobe’s are undergarments. Stockings, restrictive underwear, corsets, and garments that accentuate your womanly characteristics are of the utmost importance when dressing as a woman.” 9  Style of clothing is a personal preference and it may take a bit of body analysis to discover the womanly aspects of each individual MTF. The best places to purchase clothing for a MTF are in large metropolitan cities. “Shops for big and tall women and thrift stores yield the best results when shopping for a 6’4” drag queen.” 10 Wigs, breast forms, and shoes are very important. Where on earth do you find pumps in a size 15? In addition to the obvious answer: the Internet, Hollywood Blvd. is a Mecca of shoe stores catering to FTMs. They have pumps, stilettos, and platforms through size 16! 

Wigs are necessary. It can often take years for hair to grow into a long feminine style. Wigs can be very expensive but you indeed get what you pay for. My advice is don’t skimp on the wigs! In shopping for wigs you will immediately discover that there are two distinct types – human hair and synthetic. According to World Of Wigs:

choosing between a human hair wig and a synthetic wig is more of personal preference. … A person looking for a wig that is easy to maintain and less expensive would choose a synthetic wig…a person looking for a wig they plan on wearing everyday and that they can curl themselves would choose a human hair wig. … Keep in mind that just because human hair wigs cost more it does not mean they are the ‘better’ wig to buy. Many times a high quality synthetic wig looks more realistic than a low quality human hair wig. 11


Body contouring for the MTF is most important to assimilate. Corsets, breast forms, and curve enhancing prosthetics can be purchased online and in retail stores. Never, and I repeat never, purchase a corset off the rack. Always have it custom made to the specifications of the individual. Everyone’s body is different and corset training can have very serious health implications if the fit is not proper. Dark Garden Corsets says “A well made corset will support your ribs and hips comfortably and will very gradually reduce the actual size of your natural waist.  Corset training means frequent corset wearing. … But this progress will not last without maintenance, … your waist will not stay smaller without the corset.” 12

Classic Curves is an online boutique that specializes in undergarments designed to create the illusion of a feminine form. They sell breast forms in triangle and teardrop shapes as well as padded prosthetics “that give you the proper butt and hip proportions of a sexy woman.” They even have a device “ingeniously designed to take the loose side and chest tissue you have now … to temporarily create what appears to be absolutely real cleavage!” 13

Make up, clothing, hair removal, prosthetics – these are the easy things. Once you have made a fantastic woman out of your man it is time to consider how to go about making it permanent. Hormone therapy, plastic surgery, and changing identification to reflect her new gender can now be addressed.




Before I begin with the rudimentary elements of hormonal therapy I feel the need to address the issue of safety. In all of my research I have uncovered the standard side effects, as you will when researching any western medicine. Hormones mess with the body’s systems in very dramatic ways. The liver seems to be the organ that takes most of the abuse. Studies have been found linking hormonal usages to a variety of problems including Alzheimer’s Disease, osteoporosis, weight gain, hypertension, hypothyroidism, phlebitis, pituitary changes, changes in vision, infertility, gall bladder disease, kidney stones, skin rashes, mood swings, etc. Altering the body’s hormonal balance can really screw things up if not done with care. It is of the utmost importance that you find a physician who is experienced and skilled in hormone therapy for MTFs. Safety seems to come from a combination of moving at a slow and steady pace and through medical supervision.  Expect the physical changes to occur gradually over a period of about two years. Don’t rush it. Safety First!

Most of us know that testosterone is the hormone that makes a male manly. When dealing with transgendered hormone therapy take care to balance the hormone level with a combination of drugs.  Sheila Kirk, MD states that: “an end point … is to attain the genetic female blood levels of this male hormone.” 14

Estrogen, the hormone most often thought of as female, is available in various forms. Never exceed recommended dosages with the ‘more is better philosophy’. It is not. The dangers of hormonal therapy are widely published as with any prescription drug regimen in the states. Phlebitis, a life threatening inflammation of the veins, seems to be the greatest threat with hormonal therapy. Taking higher doses than recommended increases the risk of phlebitis and once developed will most likely mandate the cessation of estrogen.

Kirk points out that another adverse side effect of hormonal therapy is that “the ability to initiate and sustain an erection is greatly diminished.  … you can’t expect to perform ‘like a man’ if you are taking chemical substances that in essence are performing a chemical castration.” 15  Impotence also occurs and it is recommended that sperm is banked if the MTF is ever considering having children.

The heath benefits of taking hormones include what would appear to be a lowered risk of heart attacks and “production and activity of nitric oxide, … an antioxidant.” 16 The skin becomes very soft and supple with the use of estrogen. “If the patient has had electrolysis for facial hair, the skin there will be quite velvety.” 17 Oh, and there is breast growth too!

Within a year breasts should grow to be approximately the same size of the biological women in the family. If, after 18 months, the breast growth is not significant enough (for gender comfort) the MTF may choose to have augmentation as per the SOC. Progesterone aids greatly in breast growth but is not used as often in feminizing regimens because it can cause major mood swings, depression, acne and a host of other complications.

A combination of an anti-androgen, a drug that blocks testosterone, with estrogen is a Dr. Sheila Kirk’s choice for an “ideal regimen.” Using anti-androgens can allow for a lower dose of estrogen reducing potential complications. Kirk believes: “it is wise to use the estrogen alone for a time before introducing the anti-androgen.” 18

Estrogen is available in many forms: injectable, topical, oral, slow release implant, transdermal patch, and naturally occurring (in herbs and natural foods) for all the hippie MTFs. Kirk makes it clear that there is no set way to go about hormonal therapy. Everyone’s body is different and all doctors have drug preferences. “Some physicians use injectable estrogen to supplement the oral estrogen regime. Some use oral medication alone. Others will use an injectable long-acting anti-androgen added to the estrogen, which lasts approximately a month. Some doctors prefer only an oral anti-androgen added to the estrogen. What is most important is that your physician be knowledgeable and adaptable enough to change regimen and dosages as necessary.” 19




As per the SOC a real life test or experience where the MTF lives full time as a woman is recommended. “Since changing one’s gender presentation has immediate profound personal and social consequences, the decision to do so should be preceded by an awareness of what the familial, vocational, interpersonal, educational, economic, and legal  consequences are likely to be.” 20 Gender modification being what it is there are exceptions to this.

Prior to this time of the real life experience the MTF will need to have secured a legal, and gender appropriate, name. Name changes are pretty simple in most counties. You pay a fee, run a legal advertisement in a local publication, talk to the judge, and poof new name! If the many explanations, family conversations, and scenes in the workplace were as easy as changing a name maybe we would all change our gender from time to time!

As the MTF transitions into a new and socially mystifying gender much turmoil will occur.  Family and friends will try and ‘talk you out of it.’ If gender modification is in your heart why would anyone try and talk you out of it? People get very caught up in the social construct of gender. People who love a MTF will do everything they can to keep him the man they know and love. Grief is a natural process that should be expected and embraced. Life is not stagnant, it is fluid. Everything changes. I hope that my words here have helped give you a closer look at Gender Identity Disorder and the transition of a Male to Female transsexual.






1. Sheila Kirk MD. Feminizing Hormonal Therapy for the Transgendered. Pittsburg:

Together Lifeworks 1999, (page 11).

2. Pat Califia Sex Changes – The Politics of Transgenderism. San Francisco: Cleis 1997, (page 207 – 208).

3. Madeline H. Wyndzen Gender Psychology. 1 August 2005.

http://www.genderpsychology.org/ (Page 1).

4. Ibid

5. Ibid

6. Veronica Vera  Miss Vera’s Finishing School for Boys Who Want To Be Girls. 10

August 2005.  http://www.missvera.com/.

7. Carmela Vittorio, C.a; Michael Lehrer, S.a  Laser Hair Removal. Vol: 19, Issue: 1, 2003            pp. 131-136. Department of Dermatology, University of Pennsylvania,            Philadelphia, PA. Thieme Medical Publishers, Inc. ISSN: 0736-6825, (pg 2).

8. Ibid, 3

9. Reverend Mac  Personal Interview. 5 September 2005.

10. Ibid

11. World of Wigs. 1 September 2005. http://www.worldofwigs.com/wig_faq.php#Q5

12. Autumn Carey-Adamme Dark Garden Corsets. 10 August 2005.


13. Espy Lopez Classic Curves International. 1 September 2005. http://www.clcrv.com/

14. Sheila Kirk MD. Feminizing Hormonal Therapy (page 79).

15. Ibid, 51

16. Ibid, 61

17. Ibid, 38

18. Ibid, 68

19. Ibid, 69

20. Madeline H. Wyndzen Gender Psychology


































Sex — I Recommend You Have Some!

In Adventure, dating, deviance, drinking, LA, Lorelei, perverts, politics, Public, sexual politics on June 14, 2008 at 9:31 pm

Welfare, teen mothers, food stamps, the rising price of gas, the war in the middle east, the wall we are building at the US / Mexico border.  I have opinions about them all.  But in March I wrote about sex and I had ten thousand individual visitors to my blog so sex is what you will get. 


It is early in the morning.  I have a tendency to get up and write.  This morning I have something of a headache and dried cum in my hair and on my right cheek.  I thought I cleaned up well enough but I was wrong.  My hair is really crusty and as soon as I stop writing this I am going to go brush the cum into my long shinny locks.  It is great conditioner. 


“OMG what a slut – cum in her hair” I hear you thinking.  It’s my girlfriend’s cum.  Since she has been on hormones the amount of jizz has increased to what is now about two handfuls of silky whitish spunk. 


I did not know this would happen.  The doctors never mentioned it.  They suggested that her cock might stop working all together but they did not suggest that she would become multi-orgasmic or that she would have a bucket of jizz for the milking.  Now here I am with cum in my hair. 


On top of the crusty stuff on my head there is a strange man in bed with my girlfriend.  Possibly one of the reasons I actually got up to entertain you.  I’m not that great at sharing the blankets.  I don’t know what his name is.  I like it that way.  He is almost seven feet tall, statuesque, and so black that he shines.  Yum!


Lorelei and I went to a bar last night to meet a boy for a public golden shower.  While we waited this hottie started talking to my girlfriend.  The toilet boy and I went into the bathroom and when I came back with a big grin on my face and the boy went right through the front door soaking wet the hot black man at the bar started to laugh hysterically.  “You really meant it” he said to Lorelei.  “she pissed on him in the bathroom?”  


We giggled and drank and flirted until last call.  Then we headed to Canters for some late night matzo ball soup.  I could tell that he had his hand up Lorelei’s skirt.  I just smiled and drank my egg cream.  Once we were done eating I suggested that we go to the toilet to see if what he had inside his pants was worth all the trouble to bring home. 


When he pulled down his pants (at my request) my slutty girlfriend dropped to her knees.  “How in the hell am I supposed to get a good look at it if you are down there sucking on it?” I asked her.  She made some excuse about wanting it to look it’s best so we could bring him home.  Have you ever tried to tell your girlfriend that she couldn’t bring home a sexy stud?  Me either.  I hope this guy doesn’t get to thinking that he can stay for breakfast. I’m gonna wake the two of them, get my fuck on, and kick him out. I do so love a good morning romp!  


In BDSM, Comedy, dominatrix, kink, Widow Centauri on June 3, 2008 at 9:05 pm

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The Fight

In Adventure, beer, cheap men, closeted faggot, Cuckold, culture, dating, deviance, drama, drinking, Family, fights, friends, friendship, GLBTQ, Kindness, kink, perverts, politics, T-Girls, Trannies, Transsexual, traveling, violence, Widow Centauri on June 3, 2008 at 8:54 pm

What are friends?  I used to think I knew.

Recently I went to NOLA to visit my friend Lolo and little Debbie, not to be confused with Debbie.  When I had had just about enough of the bullshit that makes LA so wonderful I got a little tipsy and bought one-way greyhound bus tickets to NOLA.

That is how people get stuck in New Orleans, if you didn’t know. I’m there to visit a long time kinky friend who is miraculously “not interested in that [kink] anymore” I have been given the go ahead to talk to his new girlfriend little Debbie.  “she knows everything” Lolo assures me.  Right, sure she does.

As Lolo was out of town for business I met his new girlfriend at the bar for a drink.  After three minutes she started asking me questions about kink.  Being a big pervert and having the go ahead from Lolo I started to discuss her interests with candor, answering questions about cuckolding and transsexuals.  Lorelei and I stayed up till four in the morning talking to little Debbie about kink.  She was really excited about it, I thought.

When Lolo returned from his business trip I was happy to see him for a few minutes and then he went to stay at little Debbie’s, leaving me and Lorelei in his place.  After his three day weekend he left town on another business trip.  When he was gone, the fight happened.  It was the central drama that surrounded my recent trip to NOLA and has had me wondering what friendship is and what it means.

I have been visiting NOLA for years.  I love it there.  My girlfriend and I have become friends with a couple of pretty hard core artists.  Lexi and Travis  http://www.rustypelicanart.com

We are at the bar, having a few drinks and Lorelei and I decide to walk back to our home away from home.  These friends of ours head off in their car and pass us on the way to their place.  We had to walk past their place to get back to where we were staying which is how we came to witness the fight.

As we approached the corner I heard a couple of guys yelling.  We decided to walk on the neutral ground to avoid whomever might be fighting.  There are a lot of fights in NOLA.  When we got a few feet closer we realized that out friend was getting the living Jesus beaten out of him by the guy who shares the duplex with him.

The guy who shares the duplex is a bad dude.  He is a womanizer, a coke head, and a no good sneak of a person.  But he used to be nice enough, which is how he came to share their duplex.  For the story his name is KC but if you know him you know that this is a made up name to protect the guilty.  The very guilty.

The first thing I saw was my friend Travis get socked in the jaw and flip backwards off the concrete stairs onto the driveway, taking down his newly created piano sculpture.  He went down really hard.  I immediately thought “shit he probably has a concussion.”  When KC grabbed a motorcycle helmet and started smashing in his head I new things were way too far out of hand.

It was about that point when a cute little Austrian girl who told me her name was Sylvia approached me asking me if I knew these people and if I could help her get her purse out of KCs apartment.  I told her I would try.  I took her by the hand and snuck into Travis’s apartment, looking for her purse.  “no no” she said this is not even the same place.  I was in a different apartment.

By the time I figured out that we could get next door through the building Travis came staggering in with blood streaming from the cavity that previously was his nose.  His teeth we dangling from his face and he was mad.  He went for his gun.  His wife asked me to call the cops.  I grabbed the girl and Lorelei, dialed 911 and dashed across the street to the neutral ground.

Lorelei was covered in blood as she had put herself between them.  Travis was not fighting back, KC was trying to kill him.  We took the girl back to her apartment without her purse.  On the way she explained to us how she happened to be there — KC had sweet talked her out of the bar they had been in and brought here there without her consent.  I’m not gonna say kidnapping but she had no idea who he was, where she was, or why such violence had erupted.

When Lolo got back from his business trip we told him all about how the fight had gone.  He shrugged.  So did all the other people they seem to hang with.  Then Lolo gave KC some work and started kicking it with him.  I asked him what the hell he was doing and Lolo told me that he needed to hang out with KC cause they were buddies.

“Do you know what he just did to Travis?” I asked Lolo. “He put him in the hospital”  I informed him “He shouldn’t be trusted, let alone supplied with beer.” Lolo just sort of shrugged his shoulders and went back to hanging out with KC.

I was in NOLA for a few weeks hoping to have a chance to visit with my friend who I traveled out to see, on his invitation.  The whole time I was there I was blown off so Lolo could hang out with KC, the wanna-be killer.  I had to hear through the grapevine that my friend Lolo was pissed off at me and that I had “overstayed my welcome.”  It’s sad because I really thought that Lolo was my friend.  After all the years we have palled around he could have told me that he was too busy to have visitors, before I got down there.

Lolo and I are not speaking this week.  I think I told little Debbie a bit too much about kinky relationships.  Maybe he is trying to write me off, or maybe he actually has some reason to be mad at me now.  Either way, I left NOLA wondering a lot about what it means to be someone’s friend, why I choose the friends I choose and how it is possible that I don’t just hermit up and call it a day.

Lately so many of my friends have decided to get old, buy property, have kids, live in the suburbs, have a nervous breakdown, and simply become grumpy.  I think grumpy is the indication of old.  If you can’t have a beer and remember how to chill, not worry about your stupid roof, your brat of a kid, your wife who is probably cheating on you, or your shinny new corvette then what good are you?

I hope my readers enjoy life and try to shrug off the worries that seem to be making people old.  It would appear that that shit will catch up to you, if you let it.